Best Grief Books: 25 Books Worth Reading in 2026

The best grief books are the ones that match the loss you are carrying right now. If you only pick up three, start with It's OK That You're Not OK by Megan Devine (2017), which tells you that grief is not a problem to fix; Resilient Grieving by Lucy Hone (2017), which gives you small, research-based things to do on bad days; and Understanding Your Grief by Alan Wolfelt (2003), a workbook you can open at any chapter. Together they cover permission, practical coping and a place to write.

Below are 25 books grouped by what you lost and what you need: a partner, a parent, a child, a sudden or traumatic death, a death by suicide, a pet, a death you can see coming, books for children and teens, and workbooks. Each entry says what the book offers, who it suits, and where it may not fit. Every title was checked against a library catalogue record (Open Library, as listed in November 2026). We do not link to shops; any library can order these for you.

A note before you start: if you are thinking about ending your life, put the books down for now. In the US, call or text 988 to reach the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. In Canada, call or text 9-8-8 (the federal Government of Canada site, canada.ca, lists the service). Elsewhere, contact local emergency services.

Which grief books should you read first?

Read the one that names your situation, in short sittings, and stop if it makes things worse. Grief makes concentration hard, so the books that work early tend to be short, plainly written, or built from one-page readings.

Our three starting picks were chosen because they suit almost any loss and any stage:

• It's OK That You're Not OK (Megan Devine, 2017). Devine is a therapist who wrote it after her partner drowned. It pushes back on the pressure to "move on" and has practical chapters on sleep, anxiety and memory problems, plus a section for friends who want to help.
• Resilient Grieving (Lucy Hone, 2017). Hone, a resilience researcher in New Zealand, wrote it after her 12-year-old daughter was killed in a car crash. It turns research into small choices: where you put your attention, whether what you are doing is helping or harming you, and accepting that bad things happen to everyone. A second edition followed in 2024.
• Understanding Your Grief (Alan Wolfelt, 2003). Wolfelt, a grief educator who runs the Center for Loss and Life Transition in Colorado, organises it around ten "touchstones." It pairs with a separate journal. You can read it in any order.

If none of those fits, use the table below to find the section closest to your loss.

The 25 best grief books at a glance

Years are first publication years from library catalogue records; later editions exist for several of them.

What are the best books for grief after any loss?

For the first weeks after any death, pick a book that gives permission rather than instructions. These two work whether you lost a grandparent, a friend or someone the world does not see as "family."

It's OK That You're Not OK, by Megan Devine (2017)

What it offers: a frank argument that grief is a natural response to love and loss, not a disorder to be hurried along. The second half is practical: what happens to your brain and body, how to handle the people saying unhelpful things, and how to tend to yourself when you cannot imagine a future. Who it suits: anyone who feels pressured to be "doing better" by now. Caution: Devine is openly critical of the self-improvement framing of grief, so if you want a tidy plan, pair it with Hone or Wolfelt.

Healing After Loss, by Martha Whitmore Hickman (1994)

What it offers: 365 short daily meditations, each fitting on a page. You can read today's entry in a minute, at the kitchen table or before sleep. Who it suits: people who cannot concentrate on a full chapter, and people who like a daily ritual. Caution: it leans on reflection and some spiritual language; readers wanting evidence or practical steps should look elsewhere.

What should you read after losing a partner or spouse?

Losing a partner changes daily life as well as the heart: who you eat with, who you talk to at night, who handles the bills. The books here range from literary memoir to practical rebuilding.

The Year of Magical Thinking, by Joan Didion (2005)

What it offers: Didion's account of the year after her husband, the writer John Gregory Dunne, died suddenly at their dinner table while their daughter was critically ill in hospital. It captures the irrational thinking of early grief, like keeping his shoes because he might need them. It won the National Book Award for nonfiction. Who it suits: readers who want to feel understood, not advised. Caution: there is no advice here, and the hospital passages may be hard if your loss involved intensive care.

A Grief Observed, by C. S. Lewis (1961)

What it offers: Lewis's notebooks after the death of his wife, Joy Davidman, first published under a pseudonym. It is short and raw, and moves from anger at God toward something steadier without pretending the pain resolves. Who it suits: people of faith, people whose faith is shaken, and anyone who wants a book they can finish in an evening. Caution: the religious questions are central; secular readers may still find it honest, but it is not neutral.

Option B, by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant (2017)

What it offers: Sandberg writes about the sudden death of her husband, Dave Goldberg, while the psychologist Adam Grant brings in research on resilience, self-compassion and helping children through loss. It is the most practical of the partner books. Who it suits: widowed parents and people returning to work. Caution: Sandberg's financial security is far from most readers' circumstances, and the book acknowledges that; some readers still find it hard to relate to.

Which grief books help after the death of a parent?

Losing a parent is the loss most adults will face, which can make it feel like you should cope quietly. These books push back on that.

Motherless Daughters, by Hope Edelman (1994)

What it offers: drawing on interviews and surveys with women who lost their mothers, Edelman traces how that loss resurfaces at later milestones: weddings, pregnancy, reaching the age your mother was when she died. Later editions update the research. Who it suits: women who lost a mother at any age, including in childhood decades ago. Caution: it is long; dip into the chapters on your current life stage.

The Orphaned Adult, by Alexander Levy (1999)

What it offers: a psychologist's look at what changes when your last parent dies: your place in the family, your sense of being next in line, and the parts of yourself that only your parents remembered. Who it suits: adults in midlife, and people surprised by how hard a "timely" death has hit them. Caution: it assumes a fairly close relationship; if things with your parent were difficult or estranged, read it alongside a therapist or a support group.

Crying in H Mart, by Michelle Zauner (2021)

What it offers: the musician behind Japanese Breakfast writes about her Korean mother's cancer and death, and how cooking Korean food became a way to stay connected to her. Who it suits: readers who lost a parent to illness, children of immigrants, and anyone who grieves through food or culture. Caution: the illness chapters are detailed and may be hard for caregivers soon after a death.

What helps parents grieving the death of a child?

Parents often say most grief books do not touch their loss. These three were written by parents, and each takes a different approach: practical, spiritual and contemplative.

The Bereaved Parent, by Harriet Sarnoff Schiff (1977)

What it offers: written after the death of Schiff's young son, it is a practical guide to the first years: the funeral, the empty room, the strain grief puts on a marriage, and how to care for surviving siblings. Who it suits: parents in the early months who want concrete guidance. Caution: some details reflect the 1970s; the core advice about couples grieving differently has aged well.

Lament for a Son, by Nicholas Wolterstorff (1987)

What it offers: short, numbered reflections by a philosopher whose 25-year-old son died in a climbing accident. It refuses easy comfort and stays with the questions. Who it suits: parents who lost an adult child, and readers who want a Christian voice that does not rush to answers. Caution: it is a lament, not a guide.

Bearing the Unbearable, by Joanne Cacciatore (2017)

What it offers: Cacciatore, a researcher and bereavement counsellor whose daughter died at birth, writes short chapters drawn from her own loss and decades of work with bereaved families. It draws on mindfulness and compassion and argues that grief deserves room, not a timetable. Who it suits: parents after the death of a child, including stillbirth, and anyone facing a traumatic death. Caution: it is critical of quick psychiatric labels for grief; if your doctor has raised prolonged grief or depression, keep that conversation going.

What should you read after a sudden or traumatic loss?

A sudden death adds shock to grief. The two books here are the most evidence-based on this list, which some people find steadying.

The Other Side of Sadness, by George A. Bonanno (2009)

What it offers: a Columbia University psychologist summarises his research showing that many bereaved people are more resilient than the old models predicted, that grief tends to come in waves rather than stages, and that laughing or feeling okay is not betrayal. Who it suits: readers who want to understand grief scientifically, and people worried they are not grieving "enough." Caution: if you are struggling badly, do not read the resilience findings as a sign you are failing; the book also describes people who need more help.

Resilient Grieving, by Lucy Hone (2017)

What it offers: short chapters with strategies you can try today: choosing where you put your attention, asking whether a habit is helping or harming you, and making room for both grief and gratitude. A second edition came out in 2024. Who it suits: people after a sudden death who want something to do with their hands and minds. Caution: it is action-oriented, which can feel too soon in the first weeks; that is fine, keep it for later.

Which books help after losing someone to suicide?

Suicide loss carries questions other losses do not: why, what you missed, how to talk about it. Survivors are also at higher risk themselves, so please keep the crisis numbers at the top of this page close.

No Time to Say Goodbye, by Carla Fine (1997)

What it offers: Fine, whose husband, a physician, died by suicide, combines her story with interviews with other survivors: parents, children, siblings and spouses. It covers guilt, stigma, telling others, and the long tail of the loss. Who it suits: adults bereaved by suicide who need to know others have felt this. Caution: it is personal and story-driven rather than a step-by-step guide.

Understanding Your Suicide Grief, by Alan D. Wolfelt (2009)

What it offers: Wolfelt's touchstone format adapted for suicide loss, with space for the specific feelings of shame, anger and searching for reasons. A companion journal and a support group guide exist. Who it suits: people who like structure, and those attending a survivors' group. Caution: a workbook can stir things up; use it alongside a survivors' group or a counsellor, not instead of one.

What are good books for pet loss?

Pet loss is real grief, and it is often dismissed by people around you. These two books take it seriously.

Goodbye, Friend, by Gary Kowalski (1997)

What it offers: gentle reflections from a minister on the bond with animals, with ideas for rituals and ways to remember a pet. A revised edition came out later. Who it suits: anyone grieving a dog, cat or other companion animal, including people who feel embarrassed by how hard it has hit them. Caution: it is short and reflective; for guilt about euthanasia, Sife's book goes further.

The Loss of a Pet, by Wallace Sife (1993)

What it offers: a psychologist's guide to pet bereavement covering euthanasia decisions, guilt, explaining the loss to children and when to consider another animal. Who it suits: people stuck on "did I do the right thing," and parents helping kids through a first loss. Caution: it is more practical than lyrical.

What should you read when someone you love is dying?

Grief often starts before a death. The National Cancer Institute's summary on grief, bereavement and loss describes this anticipatory grief, which can show up while you are still caregiving.

Being Mortal, by Atul Gawande (2014)

What it offers: a surgeon writes about aging, nursing homes, hospice and the conversations families avoid until too late, including his own father's final illness. Who it suits: caregivers and families facing decisions about treatment and where someone will spend their last months. Caution: read it before the crisis if you can; it is a hard read in the final days.

When Breath Becomes Air, by Paul Kalanithi (2016)

What it offers: a neurosurgeon's memoir written while he was dying of lung cancer in his thirties, published after his death with an epilogue by his wife, Lucy. Who it suits: people with a terminal diagnosis and those who love them. Caution: it is about meaning more than coping skills.

What are the best grief books for children and teens?

Children grieve in bursts and come back to the questions as they grow. A 2017 systematic review in the Journal of Palliative Medicine analysed 210 children's books about dying and death published between 1995 and 2015 to help clinicians choose titles for families, a sign of how widely picture books are used. Read the book yourself first so you know where it goes.

The Invisible String, by Patrice Karst (2000)

What it offers: a picture book about an invisible string that connects us to the people we love, wherever they are. It is not only about death, which makes it a gentle opener. Who it suits: young children, roughly preschool to early primary. Caution: it suggests connection beyond death, so check that fits your family's beliefs.

Lifetimes, by Bryan Mellonie and Robert Ingpen (1983)

What it offers: a calm, illustrated explanation that every living thing has a beginning and an end, from plants and insects to people. Who it suits: young children who need the plain facts, ideally read before a loss. Caution: it is matter-of-fact and does not address feelings much; pair it with a conversation.

The Memory Box, by Joanna Rowland (2017)

What it offers: a child worries about forgetting someone who died and fills a box with memories. It gives children a concrete project. Who it suits: children who fear forgetting, and families who want an activity to do together. Caution: the box idea works best when an adult helps gather the items.

Healing Your Grieving Heart for Teens, by Alan D. Wolfelt (2001)

What it offers: one of Wolfelt's "100 practical ideas" books, written for teenagers, with each idea fitting on a page. Who it suits: teens who will not sit through a long book, and adults who want to leave something on a teen's desk without a lecture. Caution: some teens find the tone a little earnest; a separate journal edition exists if writing suits them better.

Which grief workbooks are worth doing?

Workbooks suit people who process by writing and doing. Go at your own pace and skip exercises that feel like too much.

The Grief Recovery Handbook, by John W. James and Russell Friedman (1988)

What it offers: a structured program of written exercises, including a timeline of losses and a letter to the person who died, designed to be done with a partner. An expanded 20th anniversary edition followed. It applies to divorce and other losses as well as death. Who it suits: people who want a clear sequence and a defined end point. Caution: its "recovery" framing sits awkwardly with current research that emphasises continuing bonds rather than closure (see the next section); take what helps.

Understanding Your Grief, by Alan D. Wolfelt (2003)

What it offers: ten touchstones such as acknowledging the reality of the death, embracing the pain, and searching for meaning, each with short readings and reflection prompts; the companion journal gives space to write. Who it suits: almost anyone, and it is widely used in support groups. Caution: it is gentle and paced slowly; if you want research, read Bonanno or Hone alongside.

What does the research say about grief and grief books?

Most people grieve without needing treatment, the old five-stage model is not well supported, and self-help works best when it matches how badly someone is struggling. Here is what the studies say.

• Grief does not follow fixed stages. Reviewing the stage model, Stroebe, Schut and Boerner concluded it lacks sound evidence and that expecting people to pass through stages can harm those who do not (Stroebe, Schut and Boerner, 2017). The NHS guidance on grief similarly says you will not necessarily go through every stage or in order. This is why our list avoids books built around stages.
• About 1 in 10 bereaved adults develop prolonged grief. A meta-analysis of 14 studies of adults bereaved by non-violent deaths found a pooled prevalence of 9.8% for prolonged grief disorder, with wide variation between studies (Lundorff and colleagues, 2017). Prolonged grief disorder is now a recognised diagnosis, and it is treatable (Eisma, 2023).
• Support helps most when it targets people who are struggling. A meta-analysis of 61 controlled studies found small effects for bereavement interventions offered to everyone, and much stronger effects for those aimed at people with marked difficulty adapting (Currier, Neimeyer and Berman, 2008). Many people improve naturally with time.
• Guided self-help can reduce grief symptoms. In a randomised trial with 110 participants, a guided internet-based self-help program of text sessions with weekly email support reduced grief symptoms compared with a wait list, with a large effect (Brodbeck and colleagues, 2019). Most participants were separated or divorced rather than widowed, so it is not a perfect match for bereavement. A smaller trial of an educational grief website for recently bereaved adults found gains in self-efficacy and lower anxiety (Dominick and colleagues, 2009).
• Writing helps some people more than others. A trial of an email-delivered writing program for distressed bereaved adults noted that earlier research found little evidence that simply writing about a loss helps, and tested whether structured instructions for people at risk would do better (van der Houwen and colleagues, 2010). If journaling leaves you worse, it is fine to stop.
• Newer books reflect "continuing bonds." An analysis of grief self-help books traced the shift from "letting go" toward keeping a meaningful connection with the person who died (Dennis, 2012). That shift is visible in Devine, Cacciatore and Hone, and is the main thing older titles like The Grief Recovery Handbook do differently.

What this does not show: there is no trial proving any single book on this list works better than another. Books are a reasonable first step, not a treatment.

How do you read a grief book so it actually helps?

Read little, often, with a pen, and connect each session to one small action. Grief shortens attention, so a short daily practice beats a weekend binge you cannot remember.

A few practical tips:

• Try audio. Many of these titles exist as audiobooks, and listening on a walk can work when reading on the page does not.
• Read with someone. Ask a sibling or friend to read the same chapter and talk about it once a week.
• Use the library. Public libraries can usually order any title here, and some offer ebook or audio loans.
• Give yourself permission to quit. A book that makes you feel judged or worse is the wrong book for now.

When is a book enough, and when should you get support?

A book is often enough if you are functioning day to day, your grief comes in waves rather than a constant flood, and you have at least one person to talk to. Get more support if the opposite is true, and get urgent help if you are thinking about suicide.

The options are different in kind, not just in intensity:

See a licensed professional, not a coach, if any of these apply:

• You have thoughts of suicide or self-harm. Call or text 988 in the US or 9-8-8 in Canada now.
• Months after the death, intense longing or preoccupation with the person dominates most days and you cannot function at work or at home.
• You have intrusive images or nightmares about the death, especially after a violent or sudden loss.
• You are drinking or using substances more to cope.
• You cannot eat, sleep or get out of bed for weeks at a time.

Coaching is not therapy or medical treatment. A good grief coach screens for these signs and refers you to a licensed professional when they appear. Our guide to grief coaching explains what a coach does and does not do, and is a grief coach worth it? walks through costs, evidence and red flags. Coaches who work with grief should hold to the boundaries described in grief and loss coaching boundaries.

What does working with a grief coach in an app look like?

Between sessions, the coach and client share one place for the next session, goals, small daily habits and, if there is a group, a community. We make Coachful, a coaching platform coaches use to run that space, so here is what a client sees inside it, using demo data.

The client's home shows the next session and the program they are in. Before a call, the coach can ask the client to complete a short form so the session starts where it matters.

A reading practice like the four-week plan above can live as habits. In the demo below, "Journaling" and "Read 30 minutes" sit next to other habits, each counting days toward a target. For someone grieving, the coach would usually set something much smaller, such as ten minutes.

Goals connect daily tasks and habits to something the client cares about, such as returning to work three days a week or sorting a parent's belongings one box at a time. Daily and weekly reflection tabs sit underneath, which is where a short note after reading can go.

Some coaches run small group programs, for example an eight-week program for adults who lost a parent. The client sees the current week and who else is in the group.

A community feed lets group members share what they are reading or post a memory, with live Q&A sessions for the group.

What Coachful is not: it is not a clinical system and is not HIPAA-certified, so it is not the place for therapy records. A grief coach using it should still refer clients to licensed professionals when the signs above appear.

How do you choose a grief coach?

Look for training in grief, clear limits on what they handle, and a plan for referring you elsewhere. Ask these questions on a first call:

• What grief-specific training do you have, and from whom?
• What will you do if I tell you I am having thoughts of suicide?
• Do you work with my kind of loss (child, suicide, partner, pet)?
• What happens between sessions? Do you set small habits, check-ins or reading?
• How long do clients usually work with you, and how do we decide to stop?

A coach who says they can treat depression or prolonged grief is overstepping. One who explains how they refer clients is a better sign.

Frequently asked questions about grief books

What is the best book on grief for a beginner?

It's OK That You're Not OK by Megan Devine is the best general starting point because it gives permission to grieve and includes practical chapters. If you can only manage a page a day, Healing After Loss by Martha Whitmore Hickman offers one short reading for each day of the year.

Are grief books helpful or can they make things worse?

For many people they help by naming feelings and showing others have survived similar losses. But a book that pushes stages, deadlines or "closure" can leave you feeling you are doing it wrong. If a book makes you feel worse, stop and try another.

What is a good grief book for losing a mother?

Motherless Daughters by Hope Edelman is the classic for women at any age. Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner is a memoir many readers find comforting, especially if food or culture tied you to your mother. The Orphaned Adult by Alexander Levy works for both mothers and fathers.

Which grief books are best for children?

For young children, The Invisible String by Patrice Karst, Lifetimes by Bryan Mellonie and Robert Ingpen, and The Memory Box by Joanna Rowland are widely used. For teenagers, Healing Your Grieving Heart for Teens by Alan Wolfelt gives 100 short ideas. Read the book yourself first.

Is there a good book for grief after suicide?

No Time to Say Goodbye by Carla Fine collects stories of suicide loss survivors, and Understanding Your Suicide Grief by Alan Wolfelt offers a structured, workbook-style approach. Please also look for a survivors' support group, and call or text 988 (US) or 9-8-8 (Canada) if you are in crisis.

Should I read about the five stages of grief?

The five-stage model is well known but not well supported by research, and expecting to move through stages in order can make people feel they are grieving incorrectly. Books that describe grief as waves, or that make room for continuing bonds, tend to fit people's experience better.

How long should I wait before reading a grief book?

There is no right time. Some people want words in the first days; others cannot focus for months. Short readings and audiobooks are easier early on, and more practical books often fit better a few weeks or months later.

When should I see a grief counsellor instead of reading?

See a licensed counsellor or therapist if you have thoughts of suicide, if months after the death intense longing dominates most days and you cannot function, or if you have intrusive images or nightmares about the death. Books and coaching can support you alongside treatment, not instead of it.

What is the difference between a grief coach and a grief counsellor?

A grief counsellor or therapist is a licensed professional who can assess and treat conditions like prolonged grief disorder, depression and trauma. A grief coach helps with routines, goals and practical next steps but does not diagnose or treat. A good coach refers you to a counsellor when needed.

Are you a coach who works with grieving clients?

If you are building a grief coaching practice, these books make a useful lending shelf, and our step-by-step plan for starting a grief coaching business covers the rest. For your own reading list, see the best books for coaches and the best books for life coaches. When you are ready to set up your practice, Coachful's guide for new coaches shows how to get started, and our roundup of the best software for grief coaches compares the options.