Forgiveness Worksheet: Copy-and-Paste Template for 2026

A forgiveness worksheet is a guided set of questions that helps a client look at a specific hurt, decide what forgiveness would and would not mean for them, and choose a next step they can live with. The free template below is written for life, relationship and grief coaches. It has eight sections: a safety check, the facts of what happened, the impact, what the client is holding onto, a clear line between forgiveness and reconciliation, a self-forgiveness track, a letter they never have to send, and a small action for the coming week.

You can paste it into any document today. If you want it sent, completed and stored with each client's record rather than living in a folder of PDFs, Coachful holds it as a worksheet inside the client's branded app, next to their sessions, check-ins and notes. We make Coachful, so read the comparison table later in this article with that in mind.

Forgiveness work sits close to grief, betrayal and sometimes harm that is still happening. That is why this version opens with a safety check, says plainly that forgiveness is not the same as excusing harm or going back to someone, and includes notes on when a coach should refer to a licensed professional instead of carrying on.

What does a complete forgiveness worksheet contain?

A complete forgiveness worksheet covers safety, a factual account, the impact, a definition of forgiveness that excludes reconciliation, a self-forgiveness option and one concrete next step. Use the checklist below to judge any version, including the one you already use.

The forgiveness worksheet template (copy and paste)

Copy everything from the title to the closing note. Replace each [bracketed] item. Keep the safety section at the top even with clients you know well; circumstances change.

Forgiveness Worksheet
Prepared for: [client first name]  |  Coach: [your name]  |  Date sent: [date]  |  To review in session on: [date]

A note before you start. This worksheet is part of your coaching with [your name]. It is not therapy and it does not diagnose or treat anything. You can skip any question, stop at any point and write "not yet" anywhere. Forgiveness here means changing your own relationship to a hurt. It does not mean saying the hurt was acceptable, and it does not require you to contact, trust or return to anyone.

Section 1. Safety first

1. Is the person you are thinking about still hurting, threatening, controlling or frightening you or someone in your care? [Yes / No / Unsure]
2. If yes or unsure: please stop here and tell me before our next session. You do not need to forgive anyone while you are still being harmed. In the US you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or text START to 88788, any time. If you are in immediate danger, call 911 or your local emergency number.
3. Are you having thoughts of harming yourself? If so, call or text 988 in the US or Canada (the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline), or your local crisis line, and let me know. We will pause this worksheet.

Section 2. Who and what

1. Who is this worksheet about? [a person, a group, an institution, yourself, or someone who has died]
2. Pick one event or pattern to work on this time: [describe it in one or two sentences]
3. When did it happen, and is it finished or still going on? [dates or "ongoing"]

Section 3. What happened, and the story you tell about it

1. Write what happened as if a neutral witness had filmed it. Actions and words only: [facts]
2. Now write what it meant to you. What did it say about you, them, or the relationship? [meaning]
3. Which parts of the meaning are you certain of, and which are guesses about their motives? [certain / guessed]

Section 4. What it has cost

1. How has this affected your feelings? [for example anger, shame, sadness, numbness, fear]
2. Your relationships, including ones with people who were not involved: [impact]
3. Your sleep, energy, work or health habits: [impact]
4. Your trust in yourself or in other people: [impact]
5. If a close friend had been through this, what would you want them to know about how understandable their reaction is? [answer]

Section 5. What you are holding, and what holding it does

1. What do you still want from this person or situation? [an apology, an admission, repayment, for them to understand, for it not to have happened]
2. Which of these is realistically possible, and which is outside your control? [possible / not in my control]
3. What does holding onto the hurt protect you from right now? [answer]
4. What does it cost you to keep holding it in the same way? [answer]

Section 6. Choosing what forgiveness means for you

Tick each statement you agree with:

• [ ] Forgiving does not mean what happened was okay.
• [ ] Forgiving does not mean I have to tell them I forgive them.
• [ ] Forgiving does not mean I have to see them, talk to them or trust them again.
• [ ] Forgiving does not mean I give up any legal, financial or practical step I am entitled to take.
• [ ] Reconciling is a separate decision that needs safety and changed behavior from them, not only effort from me.

1. In your own words, forgiveness in this situation would look like: [answer]
2. How ready do you feel to work toward that, from 0 (not at all) to 10 (fully)? [number]. What would move it one point higher? [answer]
3. Is there a boundary you need in place no matter what you decide about forgiveness? [boundary]

Section 7. If the person to forgive is you

Skip this section if it does not apply.

1. What did you do or fail to do? State it plainly, without softening or exaggerating: [answer]
2. Who was affected, and how? [answer]
3. What did you know, and not know, at the time? [answer]
4. Is there a repair you can still make (an apology, a changed habit, a practical amends) that would not cause further harm? [repair, or "none possible"]
5. What would you say to a friend who had made this same mistake and was genuinely sorry? [answer]
6. What will you do differently from now on? [one specific change]

Section 8. A letter you never have to send

1. Write to [the person, yourself, or someone who has died]. Say what happened, what it cost, what you wish had been different and what you are choosing now. Do not send it. Bring it to our session only if you want to read it aloud or talk about it. [letter]

Section 9. One step this week

1. One small action that fits where you are on the readiness scale: [for example, write the letter, stop checking their social media for seven days, tell one trusted person, add a daily two-line reflection]
2. When will you do it? [day and time]
3. What might get in the way, and what will you do if it does? [obstacle / plan]
4. Anything you want me to know before our next session? [answer]

Closing note. If writing any of this brought up memories that feel overwhelming, flashbacks, or feelings that do not ease after a day or two, tell me. I may suggest working alongside a licensed therapist or counselor, and I can keep coaching you on the parts that are coaching. Your answers are stored privately with your coaching record and are not shared without your permission.

Why does each section matter, and what should you watch for?

Each section has one job, and each has a common way of going wrong. This table is the coach's view of the template above.

What is forgiveness, and what is it not?

In coaching, forgiveness is a change in the client's own stance toward a hurt: less resentment, less replaying, more freedom to choose what happens next. It is not reconciliation, not excusing harm, not forgetting, and never a reason to stay somewhere unsafe.

Clients often arrive with one of two pictures. In the first, forgiveness is a gift to the other person that they do not deserve. In the second, it is a moral duty the client has failed at. Both make the work harder. Section 6 of the worksheet exists to replace those pictures with the client's own definition.

• Forgiveness is private. The other person does not need to know, agree or apologize.
• Reconciliation is shared. It needs the other person to take responsibility, change behavior and be safe to be around. A client can forgive and still choose no contact.
• Forgiveness is not a verdict. Harm stays harm. Legal action, a divorce settlement, a workplace complaint or a boundary can all coexist with forgiveness.
• Forgiveness is not a deadline. Some clients get there in weeks, some never do, and both can still live well.

Researchers have proposed structured forgiveness models, and some coaches build on them. If you name a specific published model in your materials, cite the source you used. The template above does not depend on any one model; it sticks to questions a coach can ask within scope.

What must life, relationship and grief coaches add?

Coaches in these three niches need a scope line, a referral plan, a safety protocol and clear rules for sensitive data before sending this worksheet. Local law matters too, especially around abuse disclosures and records.

Scope of practice

Coaching is not therapy. Your worksheet and your coaching agreement should say so in plain words. Avoid diagnostic language ("your trauma response", "your attachment disorder") and treatment language ("we will heal this"). Describe what you do instead: you help clients reflect, choose and act. If you need wording for the agreement, the clauses in our coaching contracts page show how others phrase it.

When to refer to a licensed professional

Suggest a licensed therapist, counselor, psychologist or physician when a client describes flashbacks, panic, dissociation, persistent hopelessness, thoughts of self-harm, substance use that is getting worse, an eating problem, or grief that has not eased at all over many months and stops them functioning. Write your referral list before you need it: local therapists, a crisis line, and the domestic violence hotline. You can keep coaching alongside therapy when the client and their clinician agree.

Safety when harm is ongoing

If a client is still being hurt, the coaching goal is safety and support, not forgiveness. Do not encourage contact, confrontation or reconciliation. Share the National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788) in the US, or the equivalent service where your client lives. Relationship coaches who see couples should be especially careful: joint sessions can be unsafe when one partner is controlling the other. Our page for relationship coaches and page for divorce coaches cover the tools these practices use.

Grief and forgiving someone who has died

Grief coaches will often see this worksheet used for a parent, partner or friend who has died with something unresolved. Section 5 usually shows that the apology the client wanted can no longer arrive. Pair this worksheet with a grief worksheet, and allow more time between sessions.

Sensitive data and local law

Answers to this worksheet can include details of abuse, affairs, crimes or health. Collect only what you need, store it where only you and the client can see it, and tell the client who else could see it. Mandatory reporting rules (for example about child abuse) apply to some coaches in some places and not others, and data protection law differs by country and state. Ask a local lawyer what applies to your practice. Coachful is not HIPAA-certified and is not meant for clinical record-keeping; if you are also a licensed clinician, clinical notes belong in your clinical system.

What does a filled forgiveness worksheet look like?

Here is an example for a fictional client. "Dana" is invented for illustration; the answers show the level of detail that makes a useful session, not a model of how anyone should feel.

Example only: fictional client

Section 1. Is the person still hurting you? No. We separated eighteen months ago and only communicate through a co-parenting app. No thoughts of self-harm.

Section 2. About: my ex-husband, Mark. Event: he hid that he had taken a second loan against the house for two years, and I found out from the bank. Finished, though I am still paying part of it.

Section 3. Facts: In 2023 Mark took a loan secured on the house. He did not tell me. In March 2025 a bank letter came addressed to both of us. When I asked, he said he had meant to fix it before I found out. Meaning: that I was stupid not to notice, and that our whole marriage was an act. Certain: he hid the loan. Guessed: that the whole marriage was an act.

Section 4. Feelings: anger, then shame. Relationships: I stopped telling my sister things because she warned me about him. Sleep: I check our joint account history at night. Trust: I don't trust my own judgment about money. To a friend I would say: anyone would feel betrayed, and you were not stupid to trust your husband.

Section 5. I want: him to admit it hurt me, not just that it was "a bad decision". Possible: no. In my control: how often I think about it, and fixing my finances. Holding on protects me from being fooled again. It costs me sleep and my sister.

Section 6. Ticked all five. Forgiveness for me would be thinking about the loan as a fact, not a verdict on me. Readiness: 4. One point higher would be finishing the repayment plan. Boundary: all contact stays in the co-parenting app.

Section 7. Partly applies. I blame myself for not checking the statements. At the time I knew he handled the mortgage and I had no reason to check. Repair: none needed with him. With myself: learn our finances properly. Change: monthly money review with a planner.

Section 8. Letter written. Not sending it. Want to read the last paragraph in session.

Section 9. Step: call my sister and tell her she was right and I miss her. Thursday after work. Obstacle: pride. Plan: text first. Before next session: I cried more than expected writing the letter but felt lighter the next day.

Notice what the coach would pick up: a readiness of 4 is honest and workable, the self-blame in Section 7 is the bigger thread, and the weekly step repairs a relationship rather than going back to the ex. None of the answers suggest a referral, though the night-time account checking is worth asking about.

How do you run this forgiveness worksheet in Coachful?

In Coachful, the worksheet becomes part of a client's journey: intake questions when they book, a coaching agreement signed before the first call, the worksheet in their branded app, then check-ins and habits that carry the weekly step forward. Everything stays on one client record.

Coachful is a coaching platform for coaches who deliver programs as well as sessions. One subscription covers booking, payments, contracts, programs with habits and check-ins, courses, community, a website with funnels and email, and Michelle, the built-in AI assistant. You log in once, and your client uses one app with your branding. It suits solo life, relationship and grief coaches, including those replacing four to six separate tools. It does not do clinical records, insurance billing or PayPal, and it has no permanent free plan. To start, take a free trial, and if you would rather not set things up yourself, ask the team to build it (more on that below).

Step 1: Ask the screening questions when the client books

Booking pages can include intake questions. For forgiveness work, add two or three: what brings you to coaching, whether anyone is currently hurting or threatening you, and whether you are working with a therapist. Answers land on the client record before the first call, and the Intakes page tracks those calls.

Step 2: Have the coaching agreement signed before the first call

Coachful sends coaching agreements with e-signature before the first session and stores them on the client record. Put your scope line, confidentiality limits and referral policy in the agreement so the worksheet's opening note repeats something the client has already signed.

Step 3: Add the worksheet and send it

Forms and worksheets are one of the resource types in Coachful, alongside courses, downloads, videos and AI tools. Paste the template in, keep the sections, and the client completes it in their branded app. A worksheet set before a session appears in the client's coaching hub under the next session, so they see it at the moment it matters.

Step 4: Carry the weekly step with check-ins and habits

Section 9 produces one small action. Coachful's morning and evening check-ins and habit trackers keep it visible between sessions; for example, a seven-day habit of "no checking his social media" or a two-line evening reflection. Here is a short walkthrough of check-ins:

Step 5: Fold it into a program if you run one

Many relationship and grief coaches run forgiveness as one week in a longer program. Multi-week programs hold weekly goals, daily tasks, habits and check-ins, and goals show progress with daily and weekly reflection tabs. If you are planning that structure, our guide on building a coaching program curriculum walks through it, and automating homework tracking covers the between-session part.

Step 6: Review the record before each session

The client record keeps goals, check-ins, habits, notes, intake answers, sessions and payments together, with a status of thriving, active, quiet or at risk. Michelle can brief you before the session from that live data, so you walk in knowing the readiness score and whether the weekly step happened. Payments run through your own Stripe or Razorpay account, with an invoice for each transaction.

Want more questions to sit alongside this worksheet? The coaching questions tool generates prompts by topic, and our forms and questionnaires page shows how forms fit the rest of the platform.

Why Coachful stands out: a free white-glove service. From Create, choose "We'll build it for you" and describe what you need: this forgiveness worksheet as a form, a six-week forgiveness program, a website or a funnel. You can attach up to 8 reference links and up to 10 files. The Coachful team builds it inside your own account, usually within about 24 hours. Nothing is invented for you: no fake credentials, testimonials or prices; gaps are left for you to fill. It is free on every plan. Read more about the white-glove build service.

How else can you send and store a forgiveness worksheet?

You can send this worksheet as a file, a shared form, an e-signature document or inside a practice tool. The main differences are where the answers end up and who else can read them. Prices below are as listed on each vendor's pricing page in October 2026.

A short note on the other practice tools

Practice Better, CoachAccountable and Paperbell each document client forms or worksheets as part of a client portal. Practice Better also lists charting and telehealth for wellness practitioners, and has a free Sprout plan for up to three clients. CoachAccountable lists worksheets, action plans and metrics, priced by active client. Paperbell lists packages, contracts and a client portal under one price. Figures are as listed in October 2026; check each pricing page before you choose.

What are the most common mistakes with a forgiveness worksheet?

The most common mistakes are skipping safety, treating forgiveness as the goal rather than an option, and sending the worksheet too early in the relationship.

• Sending it in week one. Forgiveness work needs trust. Most coaches wait until a client has named the hurt themselves and shown they can handle a reflective exercise; a self-compassion worksheet is a gentler first step.
• Leaving out "not yet". Without a readiness scale, clients who are not ready either fake it or quit the worksheet.
• Merging forgiveness and reconciliation. If the worksheet implies contact, clients who need distance feel pushed. Section 6 should be ticked one statement at a time, not as one block.
• Coaching through an emergency. If the safety section raises a flag, stop the worksheet. A coaching question is not a safety plan.
• Collecting detail you do not need. You do not need a full account of abuse to coach someone. Keep Section 3 to what they choose to write.
• Using therapy language. Words like "heal", "trauma work" and "treatment" set an expectation coaching cannot meet.
• Storing answers in email. These are some of the most private things a client will write. Use a place with access controls, and say where it lives.
• No follow-up. A worksheet without a review date gets filed and forgotten. Book the review when you send it.
• Only one direction. Some clients need to forgive themselves first. Keep Section 7 even if you expect it to be skipped.

Related worksheets that pair well: the boundaries worksheet for the boundary in Section 6, the communication worksheet if the client does want a conversation, and the cognitive reframing worksheet for the story in Section 3. Coaches building a full practice can also see our page for life coaches.

Is this worksheet legal, medical or psychological advice?

No. This template is a coaching tool and is not legal, medical, psychological or financial advice. It does not assess, diagnose or treat any condition.

Ask a licensed clinician to review your version if you work with clients who have experienced abuse, trauma or complicated grief, or if you plan to use it in groups. Ask a lawyer where you practice to review your coaching agreement, your confidentiality limits, any duty to report, and how you store sensitive answers. Rules differ by state and country, so a template cannot settle them for you.

Frequently asked questions

Is this forgiveness worksheet free to use?

Yes. Copy it, edit it and use it with your own clients. Keep the safety and scope sections, and adapt the wording to your voice and your local services.

Can I use it for self-forgiveness only?

Yes. Keep Sections 1, 4, 6 and 9, and make Section 7 the main exercise. Swap "the person" for "myself" in Section 2. Many clients find self-forgiveness harder than forgiving others, so allow more time.

Does forgiveness mean my client has to reconcile?

No. Forgiveness is a change in the client's own stance. Reconciliation is a separate, shared decision that needs safety and changed behavior from the other person. A client can forgive and keep no contact.

What if my client is still being harmed?

Stop the forgiveness work and focus on safety. In the US, share the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or text START to 88788, and 911 for immediate danger. Encourage them to work with specialist services and, where appropriate, a licensed professional.

When should a coach refer instead of using this worksheet?

Refer when a client describes flashbacks, panic, dissociation, thoughts of self-harm, worsening substance use, or grief that has stopped them functioning for a long time. You can often keep coaching alongside a therapist if everyone agrees on roles.

How long does the worksheet take?

Most clients need 30 to 60 minutes, and many spread it over several days. The unsent letter usually takes longest. Tell clients they can do one section at a time.

Can I use it in group coaching?

Use it as private homework rather than something shared aloud. In groups, discuss the ideas in Section 6 together and let people keep their answers to themselves. Have a plan for anyone who becomes distressed.

Where should I store completed worksheets?

Somewhere access-controlled and tied to the client, not in email attachments. In Coachful, answers stay on the client record. Coachful is not HIPAA-certified, so licensed clinicians should keep clinical notes in a clinical system.

What is Coachful's free white-glove service?

It is a free build service on every plan. You describe what you want, such as this worksheet as a form or a forgiveness program, attach references, and the Coachful team builds it in your account, usually within about 24 hours. It leaves gaps for you rather than inventing credentials, testimonials or prices.

How much does Coachful cost?

Coachful has flat monthly plans; lower plans cap the number of clients and Pro is unlimited (Lite: $29/month for up to 5 clients; Solo: $49/month for up to 20 clients; Pro: $99/month with unlimited clients; Studio: $199/month with unlimited clients). There is a free trial, and monthly plans cancel in one click.