What to Do If a Coaching Client Mentions Suicide

Here is what to do if a coaching client mentions suicide: stop the coaching agenda, ask them plainly whether they are thinking about ending their life, stay with them, and connect them to crisis help before the conversation ends. If they are in immediate danger, call emergency services (911 in the US, 9-1-1 in Canada, 999 in the UK, 112 or 999 in Ireland, 000 in Australia, 111 in New Zealand). If they are not in immediate danger, help them contact a crisis line now: 988 in the US, 9-8-8 in Canada, Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland, Lifeline on 13 11 14 in Australia, 1737 in New Zealand. Afterwards, write down what happened, follow up within a day, and get support for yourself. Crisis numbers and any legal duties differ by country and state, so check yours today, not on the day you need them.

We make Coachful, a coaching platform, and the honest place it helps here is before the crisis, not during it: a coaching agreement that says what you do when safety is at risk, an intake form that asks for the client's location and an emergency contact, factual notes on the client record, and a welcome area where your client can always find the crisis number for their country. None of that replaces a phone call to a crisis line. It just means you are not hunting for a number while someone you care about is talking.

This is not medical or legal advice. Coaching is not therapy or crisis care. This article gives a practical routine for coaches who are not clinicians; if you are unsure what to do with a specific client, call a crisis line yourself and ask. They take calls from people worried about someone else.

What should you do in the first hour? The checklist

Do six things, in this order, and do not skip to the last one. The table below is the whole answer in one place; the sections after it explain why each step matters and give you the exact words.

If you only remember one line, make it this: you are not there to assess risk like a clinician or to talk them out of it. You are there to notice, ask, stay and connect.

Why does each step matter?

Each step closes a specific gap that new coaches fall into: changing the subject, asking vaguely, not knowing where the client is, handing over a number and hanging up, never checking back, and carrying it alone. Here is the reasoning behind each one.

1. Stop the agenda, because the client is testing whether you heard

Suicidal thoughts often surface sideways. "Honestly, sometimes I think everyone would be better off without me." "I don't see the point of this plan if I'm not going to be around." "I've been giving some of my things away." A coach in session mode is focused on the goal, the plan and the next action, and it is very easy to say "Let's park that" and move on. That is the response that teaches a client not to say it again. Stopping out loud tells them you heard it and it matters more than the plan.

2. Ask directly, because vague questions get vague answers

"Are you okay?" lets someone say "I'm fine." "You don't mean that, do you?" tells them which answer you want. A plain question using the word "suicide," "killing yourself" or "ending your life" gives the client permission to answer honestly, and it gives you information you need for step 3. Many coaches worry that naming it might make things worse. Crisis services such as 988, Samaritans and Lifeline all exist precisely so people can talk about suicide openly, and the client has already brought it into the room. You are just making sure you both mean the same thing.

3. Check danger and location, because help is local

If someone has taken something, has the means in front of them, or tells you they are about to act, this is an emergency and the right number is the local emergency number, not a crisis line. The New Zealand 1737 service puts it clearly: if someone is in immediate danger of harming themselves or others, call 111. Lifeline in Australia opens its site with "If life is in danger, call Triple Zero (000)," and 9-8-8 in Canada says to call 9-1-1 right away if safety is at risk. Online coaching makes location harder: your client may be in another city, another state or on holiday abroad. Emergency services in your country cannot reach a client in theirs, which is why you need the address before anything else.

4. Stay and connect, because a number is not a handoff

Giving someone a phone number and ending the call feels responsible, and it leaves them alone at the hardest moment. A warm handoff means you stay connected (on video, on the phone, or in the room) while they call, text or chat with the crisis line, or you call together with their permission. Crisis lines are built for this: 988 in the US says using the Lifeline is free and the conversation is confidential, and Samaritans says 116 123 is free from landlines and mobiles, including pay-as-you-go phones with no credit.

5. Agree the next contact, because tomorrow is part of the plan

A fixed follow-up time does two things. It gives the client one small thing to hold on to, and it gives you a clear trigger: if they do not reply at 10, you know what to do next (try again, then use the emergency contact you agreed at intake). Ask who can be with them tonight. A partner, a friend, a sibling, a neighbour. People do better when they are not alone.

6. Write it down and get support, because memory fades and you are human

Factual notes protect the client (you remember what was agreed), protect you (you can show what you did) and help any professional who picks up later, with the client's consent. And the coach matters too. Sitting with someone in that state is heavy, and new coaches often hold it alone for days. Step 6 is not optional.

Which crisis line do you give, and in which country?

Give the number for the country the client is in right now, not the country you are in. The table below lists the national lines named in this article, checked on each service's official page as listed in November 2026. Save the row for every country your clients live in, and check again every few months, because services change: Samaritans, for example, has closed its email service in the UK and runs web chat only as a small pilot that is not yet available to everyone.

For any other country, search the national health ministry's website, not a general search result, and add the number to your list before you take on a client there. And keep one detail in mind: every one of these lines also takes calls from people who are worried about someone else. If you are unsure what to do mid-session, you can call too.

How do you tell how urgent it is?

Listen for three things: whether they have thought about how, whether they have the means, and whether they intend to act soon. You are not diagnosing; you are deciding which number to dial. When in doubt, treat it as the more urgent row.

A note on "contracting for safety": asking a client to promise they will not hurt themselves is not a safety plan, and it can make them less likely to tell you the truth next time. Ask instead what they will do, who they will call and when you will next hear from them.

What exactly do you say? Scripts you can copy

Use your own voice, but having words ready stops you from freezing. These are written for a 1:1 video or phone session; adjust for in person.

When something sounds like a hint

"Can I stop us there? You said you sometimes think everyone would be better off without you. I want to ask you something directly, and it's okay to answer honestly. Are you thinking about suicide?"

When they say yes

"Thank you for telling me. I'm really glad you said it out loud. I'm not going anywhere. Can you tell me a bit more: are you thinking about it right now, today?"

"Are you safe at this moment? Where are you right now, and is anyone with you?"

Offering the warm handoff

"I'm a coach, and this is bigger than what I'm trained for, but I don't want you to deal with it alone. There's a free line that's there for exactly this, 24 hours a day. Would you call 988 now while I stay on this call with you? If you'd rather text, that works too."

"Would it help if I'm the one who starts the call and then hands it to you?"

If they don't want to call

"Okay. Can we agree on something smaller, then? Who could be with you this evening? Could we message them together now? And can you put the number in your phone while we're talking, so it's there at 2 a.m. if you need it?"

If they refuse and you believe they are in immediate danger, call emergency services for their location. Tell them you are doing it and why: "I care about you too much not to. I'm calling for help now and I'm staying with you."

Closing the call

"Before we hang up, let's go through it once: you're going to stay with your sister tonight, you have 988 saved, and I'll message you tomorrow at 10. If you don't reply by noon, I'll call your sister, like we agreed in your intake form. Is that okay?"

The next-day message

"Hi Sam, it's 10, like I said. No need for a long reply, I just want to know how you are this morning. Even one word is fine."

If a client messages you about suicide out of hours

"I'm really glad you reached out. I'm calling you now. If I can't get through: please call or text 988 right away, and if you are in danger, call 911. I'm here."

Then call. A message is not enough when someone has told you they are thinking about suicide, even if it is 11 p.m. and you were about to sleep.

What changes on video, by message or across borders?

Three things change: you might not know where the client is, the connection can drop, and the client may be in a country whose numbers you don't know. Fix all three before the first session.

• Location. Ask at intake for the client's usual address and city, and at the start of any session where something feels off, ask "Where are you joining from today?" Online clients travel.
• A second channel. Have their phone number as well as the video link. If the video drops during a crisis conversation, call the phone straight away.
• An emergency contact. Ask for one name and number at intake, and say clearly in your agreement when you would use it.
• The right number. Keep the country table above on hand. A US coach working with a client in Melbourne gives Lifeline and 000, not 988 and 911.
• Messages. Text and app messages are easy to misread and easy to miss. Tell clients at onboarding that messages are not monitored for emergencies, and put the crisis numbers next to that sentence. Our guide to between-session support boundaries has wording for response times.

If your clients message you through an app, make sure your welcome message or pinned note says what the app is for and where to go in an emergency. That one sentence is often what a client reads at midnight.

Can you break confidentiality to keep a client safe?

Usually you can, if you said so in advance, but the rules differ by country and state, so check with an attorney or solicitor where you practise. In many places coaches are not covered by the professional confidentiality rules that apply to licensed therapists, which cuts both ways: there may be no formal duty to warn, and there may be no special privilege protecting your notes either. What protects you and the client is clarity agreed at the start.

Put a clause like this in your coaching agreement and say it out loud in your first session. It is a starting point, not legal advice; have a local lawyer review it.

Safety and confidentiality. What you share in coaching stays between us, with these exceptions: if I believe you or someone else is at serious risk of harm, I may contact emergency services, a crisis service, or the emergency contact you have given me, and I will share only what is needed to keep you safe. Coaching is not therapy, counselling or crisis care. If you are in crisis, please contact emergency services or a crisis line straight away rather than waiting for our session or messaging me. Current numbers for your country are in your welcome area.

For the broader picture of what coaches promise about privacy, see client confidentiality in coaching, and for a ready contract structure, coaching contracts.

What should you write down afterwards?

Write short, factual notes the same day: what the client said in their own words, what you asked, what they answered, who you contacted, and what was agreed. Leave out guesses, diagnoses and opinions.

• Date, time, and how you were connected (video, phone, message)
• The client's words that raised concern, quoted as closely as you can
• Your direct question and their answer
• Whether they said they had a plan, means or intent, in their words
• Where they were
• What happened: crisis line called together, emergency services contacted, emergency contact called
• What was agreed: who they will be with, next contact time
• Follow-up: when you messaged, whether they replied
• Who you debriefed with (supervisor, mentor), without the client's name if they are outside your practice

What not to write: "client is depressed," "client is not really at risk," or anything that reads like a clinical assessment. You are not qualified to make one, and a note that pretends otherwise helps nobody. If you work alongside a client's therapist, share only with the client's consent, unless it is an emergency.

Decide how long you keep these notes and where. Clinical records belong in a clinical system; coaching notes should follow your own written policy. Our guide to a client record retention and deletion policy walks through it.

Should you keep coaching them?

Often yes, but not as if nothing happened, and usually alongside support from a mental health professional. A suicide disclosure does not mean you must end the relationship. It does mean the next session starts with a check-in, not the goal tracker.

1. Next session: ask how they have been since, whether they contacted the crisis line or their doctor, and whether they have support in place.
2. Talk about scope honestly: "I'd like to keep working with you on your career change, and I also think you deserve support from someone trained in this. Would you be open to seeing a GP or a therapist alongside our work?"
3. Consider pausing if the client cannot engage with coaching right now. Pausing is not abandoning. Offer to hold their place and refund or freeze the remaining sessions.
4. Adjust the work: take the pressure off deadlines and stretch goals for a while. A 90-day push to launch a business may not be what helps this month.
5. Keep checking in at the start of each session for the next few weeks with a simple "How are you, really, this week?"

If you find you are frequently working with clients in distress, it is worth reading what to do when a client cries in a coaching session and reviewing whether your niche and marketing are attracting people who need therapy first. Clear screening at the start, covered in how to prepare a client for coaching, helps.

Who looks after you afterwards?

You do, on purpose, the same day. Coaches who have just been through a suicide disclosure often replay it for days: did I say the right thing, should I have called sooner, what if they don't reply tomorrow.

• Debrief with someone qualified. A coaching supervisor, a mentor coach, or your own therapist. Keep the client anonymous.
• You can call the crisis line too. These lines support people who are worried about someone. Calling 988, 9-8-8, Samaritans, Lifeline or 1737 to talk through what happened is a legitimate use of the service.
• Clear the rest of the day if you can. Move a discovery call. Nobody gets your best coaching right after this.
• Know your own limits. If you have a history with suicide in your own life, you can still coach well, and you should also have a plan for your own support. Our article on coaching when you live with anxiety covers the same idea.
• If a client dies by suicide, it is not your failure, and you will need real support. Talk to a supervisor or therapist, and do not go through it alone.

A fictional example: Thursday, 7:40 p.m.

This example is fictional. Names and details are invented to show the steps in order.

Priya is a career coach in her second year of practice, based in Leeds. Her client Daniel, 34, lives in Toronto and has been working with her for six weeks on leaving a job in logistics. Twenty minutes into a video session, while they are talking about his notice period, he says: "To be honest, I don't know why I'm planning any of this. I don't think I'll be around for it."

Priya closes the document she was screen-sharing. "Daniel, I want to stop us there. When you say you won't be around, are you thinking about killing yourself?" He is quiet, then says yes, he has been thinking about it for a couple of weeks, more since his father's illness. She asks whether he is thinking about it right now and whether he is safe. He says he has not done anything and is at home alone.

She checks the intake form she sent at the start: his address is in Toronto and his emergency contact is his sister, Meera, who lives twenty minutes away. Because he is in Canada, Priya does not reach for Samaritans; she gives him 9-8-8. "There's a line in Canada for exactly this. Would you call or text 9-8-8 now while I stay here?" He chooses to text. Priya stays on video while he does, reading nothing, just present. After a few minutes he says the person on the other end is asking him questions and he wants to keep talking with them.

Before they end, they agree three things: he will call Meera tonight and ask her to come over, he will keep the 9-8-8 conversation going, and Priya will message him at 10 a.m. Toronto time tomorrow. Priya repeats it back, and he says it back to her.

After the call, Priya writes a short note on his client record: what he said in his words, her question, his answer, his location, the 9-8-8 text, the plan for Meera, and the follow-up time. Then she calls her supervisor. The next morning she messages at 10:00 Toronto time. He replies at 10:12: "Meera stayed over. Booked my GP for Monday." Priya moves their next session back by a week, offers to keep his remaining sessions on hold, and at their next session asks first how he is, not what he did about his notice period.

What made the difference was not perfect wording. It was that Priya already had his location, his sister's number and the right country's crisis line, so the whole conversation could be about Daniel.

How do you set this up in Coachful before you need it?

Set up four things once: the agreement, the intake form, the client record, and the welcome area. If you use Coachful, all four live in the same account, so the information is where you need it at 7:40 p.m.

• Agreement with a safety clause. Coachful sends coaching agreements with e-signature before the first call and stores the signed copy on the client record. Paste the safety and confidentiality clause above into your template so every client signs it. See coaching contracts.
• Intake questions. Add intake questions to your booking or onboarding form: usual location (city and country), a phone number, and one emergency contact with the line "I'll only use this if I'm worried about your safety." The answers sit on the client record. Our forms and questionnaires page shows how forms work.
• Notes on the client record. Each client's record holds notes, intake answers, goals, check-ins, sessions and payments in one place, with quick actions to message or start a video call. That is where your factual crisis note goes.
• Crisis numbers in the welcome area. Add a short resource to the client's branded home with the crisis line and emergency number for their country, plus the sentence "Messages to me are not monitored for emergencies." Our guide to a client welcome packet has the structure.

The client record also shows an engagement status (thriving, active, quiet or at risk). Treat it for what it is: a sign that someone has gone quiet on their program, which is worth a personal message. It is not a mental health screen and it will not detect suicidal thoughts. The same applies to check-ins with a mood question: a low mood answer is a reason to reach out as a human, not something to automate.

Here is a short walkthrough of the client area, where the record, notes and quick actions live:

One more setting to think about if you use the AI Coach (an AI version of you that selected clients can chat with between sessions). You choose which clients get it and configure its personality and tone. An AI is not a crisis service, so do not switch it on for a client you know is struggling, and tell every client who has it that it is not for emergencies and that crisis numbers are in their welcome area.

Coachful also has clear limits that matter for this topic. It is not HIPAA-certified, offers no BAA, and is not built for clinical record-keeping; if you are a licensed clinician who also coaches, keep clinical notes in a clinical system. Data can be exported in full as a ZIP if you ever need to move it. Plans are flat monthly (Lite: $29/month for up to 5 clients; Solo: $49/month for up to 20 clients; Pro: $99/month with unlimited clients; Studio: $199/month with unlimited clients), and there is a free trial.

Why Coachful stands out: a free white-glove service. If setting up the agreement template, intake form and welcome area feels like one more job you will get round to next month, ask the Coachful team to do it. From Create, choose "We'll build it for you," describe what you want (for example "an intake form with location and emergency contact, and a welcome resource with crisis numbers for the UK and Canada"), attach your existing documents, and the team builds it inside your own account, usually within about 24 hours. They will not invent anything; gaps such as your own wording are left for you. Details are in the white-glove service guide.

What mistakes do new coaches make?

Most mistakes come from wanting to help and not knowing how, not from carelessness. These are the ones to avoid.

• Moving on. "Let's come back to that" after a hint of suicide. Always stop and ask.
• Asking around it. "You're not thinking of doing anything silly, are you?" invites a no. Use the word.
• Trying to fix it. Reframing, silver linings and a gratitude exercise are not the response. Listening and connecting are.
• Handing over a number and hanging up. Stay until they are connected or have a plan with a time.
• Giving the wrong country's number. 988 does not work from Australia. Check where they are.
• Promising secrecy. "This stays between us" in a crisis is a promise you may need to break. Say what you will do instead.
• Getting a safety promise instead of a plan. "Promise me you won't" is not a plan. Who, where and when is.
• Writing clinical notes. Record facts and words, not diagnoses.
• Waiting for the next session to follow up. Next day, specific time.
• Carrying it alone. Debrief the same day.
• Having no plan until it happens. The agreement clause, intake questions and crisis-number list take an hour to set up. Do it this week.

Frequently asked questions

Is it my job as a coach to deal with a client's suicidal thoughts?

It is not your job to treat them, but it is your job to respond. Stop, ask directly, stay with the client and connect them to a crisis line or emergency services. Ongoing support belongs with a doctor or mental health professional, and you can keep coaching alongside that if it helps the client.

Will asking about suicide put the idea in their head?

The client raised it first, so you are not introducing anything; you are making sure you understood. Crisis services exist so people can talk about suicide openly, and a direct question is usually a relief. Use plain words like "Are you thinking about suicide?"

What if the client is in a different country from me?

Use the crisis line and emergency number for the country the client is in at that moment. Ask where they are joining from, and keep their address and an emergency contact from intake. Emergency services in your country cannot help someone in theirs.

Do I have to tell anyone if a client is suicidal?

Rules vary by country and state, and coaches are usually not covered by the same laws as licensed therapists, so check with a local attorney or solicitor. In practice, if someone is in immediate danger, call emergency services. Your agreement should say in advance that you may contact emergency services or an emergency contact if safety is at risk.

What if they ask me not to tell anyone?

Do not promise secrecy. Say, "I can't promise that if I'm worried about your life, but I will always tell you what I'm doing and why." Then focus on what they are willing to do, such as texting a crisis line with you on the call.

Can I message the client the crisis number instead of calling?

Send the number, and also call. A message alone can sit unread. If you cannot reach them and you believe they are in danger, contact emergency services for their location.

Should I stop coaching a client who has mentioned suicide?

Not necessarily. Many clients benefit from continuing, with support from a mental health professional alongside. Pause or adjust the work if they cannot engage right now, and start each session with a genuine check-in for the next few weeks.

What should a coaching agreement say about suicide and safety?

It should say that coaching is not crisis care, where to go in an emergency, and that you may contact emergency services or a named emergency contact if you believe someone is at serious risk. Use the clause in this article as a starting point and have a local lawyer review it.

What is the Coachful white-glove service and can it help with this?

It is a free build service on every Coachful plan: you describe what you need and the team builds it in your account, usually within about 24 hours. For this topic, it can set up an intake form with location and emergency contact fields, your agreement template and a welcome resource with crisis numbers. You still write and approve the wording.

Where do I find the right crisis number quickly?

Keep a list in your phone and in your practice notes for every country your clients live in, using the table in this article as a start. Check each number on the service's official website every few months, since services change.

Every coach hopes this never comes up. If it does, you will not need perfect words; you will need to ask, to stay and to know which number to dial. Spend an hour this week on the agreement clause, the intake questions and your crisis-number list, and you will have done most of the work before it matters.